Written by: Deborah Mitnick, LCSW-C

Expensive Emotions

It was serendipitous. I was taking a friendly walk with a woman the other day. We've been acquaintances for a few years. It was just supposed to be a friendly, "getting-to-know-you" walk.

But, you know how these things happen. She began to tell me about something in her life; I asked if she wanted to try this "tapping stuff;" and you can probably predict the end of the story.

She told me afterwards that 40 years of guilt and inability to forgive melted away. She's a retired acupuncturist. She said she'd never felt so energized and had never seen a patient of her own have the kind of result she achieved with me.

I'll tell you about it. All details have been altered to preserve confidentiality.

"Helen" is a 75-year-old retired acupuncturist who has suffered from feelings of guilt for over 40 years. The guilt, as it turns out, started with a comment she made to her husband that she has always considered to be damaging to the relationship. She has maintained a distance from him ever since, and her husband reports that he's not felt loved since the original incident occurred. They've never really discussed the incident, but IT has been between them ever since.

This event has colored every part of Helen's life and has been expensive to both her marriage and professional career. Although she was an excellent acupuncturist, she realizes that she "never gave 100%" of herself to her job or her patients because of her need to maintain the distance that she was constantly re-enacting from the marriage.

Although she listened carefully to her patients, she was aware of a constant "hum of guilt" in her head that kept her from functioning fully on the job. Guilt is expensive, very expensive, and costs both personally and in the workplace. She said that, although her patients received great benefits from their work with her, she realized that she could have been more effective in her career if she hadn't lived every moment under this cloud of guilt. Before our "walking-session" together, she had never been able to forgive herself for her "wrongdoing."

Her SUDS level was a nine when we started. We tapped for "this husband betrayal," "this guilt about the past," and "I don't deserve to get over this guilt emotion." All such rounds brought her SUDS level to 0.

During our walk, she reported that the guilt had simply faded and that she'd never felt so energized by any process. Her body temperature increased, and she "could feel the [positive] energy rush" through her. She kept exclaiming, "Wow, I can't believe that went away!"

I felt slightly inhibited, working with an "official" acupuncturist with this energy work, but I managed to put my inhibitions aside and just keep doing what I knew would have a positive outcome. I was also aware that there we were, walking in the street, and I was tapping all over this nice lady. Cars were rushing by. People were walking by. Nonetheless, I stayed focused on my work (at least pretty much, considering the distractions of the people and the cars) until I decided that I should tap on her ankles. So, there I was, in the middle of a fairly busy street, with this older lady standing above me, and I'm hunched over, tapping madly at her ankles. For a moment, I let my "observer" take a look and I realized what a picture the two of us made! Oh well, such is the life of a dedicated energy therapist! We would tap, then walk, then tap, and then walk some more. (This was not my most aerobic walk, I must admit!)

I occasionally used the Floor-to-Ceiling (? Street-to-Sky?) Eye Roll and the Nine-Gamut Procedure. I also had her tap for "Forgiveness" and that's when she had the cognitive shift that signified the successful end of the session. She said:

Helen called me the day after our walk to let me know that she continued to have high energy and that she was now functioning "at 100%." Her husband noticed the change immediately and Helen reported that the relationship felt healed. She began writing a professional paper that she'd been wanting to write for an acupuncture journal, but hadn't had the focus to do before.

When I was a traditional therapist (before EFT and the other new power therapies), this kind of result probably would have taken about six years, if it happened at all.

By contrast, this session took 23 minutes and the expensive, ongoing guilt is nowhere to be found.

I was happy to be with Helen, even for such a brief period of time. I was there to witness her "birth" of spirit. I felt quietly peaceful for her.